


you define me

by Nikiforlove (orphan_account)



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Fluff, Hijinks & Shenanigans, M/M, Mistletoe, fries, hotdogs, misnormers, set in christmas ok, vitya is a dork
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-12
Updated: 2017-06-12
Packaged: 2018-11-13 10:46:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 730
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11183514
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/Nikiforlove
Summary: "Yuuri, define hot dogs," Viktor mumbled as he walked hand-in-hand with Yuuri, heading to their favorite café for a lunch date."What?" Yuuri asked, hoping he didn't hear right."Did I fucking stutter? Hot dogs. Define it," Viktor deadpanned, looking at Yuuri straight in the eye.





	you define me

"Yuuri, define hot dogs," Viktor mumbled as he walked hand-in-hand with Yuuri, heading to their favorite café for a lunch date.

"What?" Yuuri asked, hoping he didn't hear right.

"Did I fucking stutter? Hot dogs. Define it," Viktor deadpanned, looking at Yuuri straight in the eye.

The japanese man sighed, slightly shaking his head.

"I'm being serious here!" Viktor pouted, "Please?"

"Fine," Yuuri tapped his chin, pursing his lips. "Let's see, aren't they made out of pork and-"

"Exactly! Pork!" Viktor cut in, eyes ablaze. "It isn't made out of dogs, but pork! Freaking pork, Yuuri!"

"Well-"

"Also, what if it's cold? Like, it just came out from the freezer? It isn't always hot, right?" Viktor interjected again, waving his hands around. "Cold porks- no, Cold pigs!"

"Jesus Christ, Viktor." 

"Admit it, it's completely misnamed."

Yuuri sighed, giving in. "Yes, yes. You have a point, now hush, we're already here."

"See? It's been bugging me for days!" Viktor cried, setting a hand on the café door to open it for Yuuri. "Mhm," he nodded as they stepped in, walking to the counter to line up.

"So, what're you getting?" Yuuri asked, looking up at the menu board.

"French Fries," Viktor mumbled, staring at Yuuri.

"Vitya, they don't sell French Fries here-"

"I know. It's just that- French Fries. They were invented by the Belgians, Yuuri!"

Yuuri groaned, "Viktor-"

"It was only made popular by the French, but it all originated from the Belgians! Shouldn't it be called Belgian Fries?"

"Okay, yes, you have another point, but please. What's your damn order, Vitya?"

"Whatever you're getting," he shrugged, looping his arm around Yuuri's.

"Mmm."

"Hello, may I take your order?" The cashier woman asked, giving them a customary smile. "We'll both have Today's Special, uh... with Lemonade as drinks," Yuuri said, bringing out his wallet. It was he who promised to treat Viktor after all.

"Thank you," the woman replied, "That'll be 25.99." He nodded, taking out the exact amount and placing it on the counter. "Here's your number, please take a seat. Your order will be with you in 5-10 minutes," she told them, handing them their table number. 

"Thanks." But before Yuuri could turn to leave, Viktor slammed his hands on the counter, eyeing the cashier. "French Fries," he deadpanned, "--They should be called Belgian Fries, right?" 

"Eh?" The woman stuttered, slightly intimidated.

Yuuri flushed, attempting to drag Viktor away from the counter. "Dammit Viktor, people are staring-"

"--and hot dogs should be called cold pigs!" he rambled, "Maybe even room-temperature pigs! Right?" The poor cashier looked at them with confusion, slowly backing away from the register. 

"Viktor!" Yuuri cried, finally managing to pry him away from the counter. "I'm sorry," he apologized to the flustered woman, bowing slightly before dragging Viktor to their table. Sighing for what seemed to be the upteenth time today, Yuuri took a seat. "Yuuri," Viktor pouted. "Are you mad?" Yuuri frowned, "A bit."

"It was impulse. I'm sorry, Yura. I got a little bit too riled up." Viktor sighed, hanging his head. "It's okay," Yuuri said, resting his chin on his palm, "You should've apologized to that poor woman, not me." Viktor pouted, fidgeting with his fingers. 

Yuuri's eyes flicked upwards, glinting mischivously at what he saw. "My turn," he whispered to himself. "Viktor," he called, "Define mistletoe." The russian shot his head back up, shifting his gaze towards Yuuri. His face lit up, "Oh those! My mother used to hang those back at home when I was a kid during Christmas," Viktor chuckled. "If my memory serves right, it's a green shrub with yellowish flowers and white berries, correct?" Yuuri hummed, "Mhm, now look up."

Viktor did as told, tilting his head upwards. "Oh look! It's a mistletoe above!" Viktor smiled as he noticed the small plant hanging above their table. "Yuuri-" 

He was cut off by Yuuri jolting up and leaning towards Viktor, tilting his chin as he kissed him. Viktor was shocked, but soon enough eagerly complied, moving in sync with Yuuri. 

It was a chaste little kiss, but t'was sweet.

Yuuri plopped back into his seat, smiling happily. "That's what you get for what you did," he smirked.

"Touché," Viktor scoffed. He totally forgot the tradition that happened under the mistletoe.

"I ain't budging on cold pigs or Belgian Fries though," he added, crossing his arms.

"Yeah, yeah."

**Author's Note:**

> kudos and comments fuel meeee


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